Work it Out

There it is. THE chart.

This is hanging on my wall, in our loft. It’s a LARGE picture frame. I bought one for each of us years ago, flipped the paper inside of it over to show the white side. Now we’ve each got our own dry erase boards.

Blue and I each use our to chart weight loss and working out. Seeing it on a chart is motivational for us. The kids have their list of daily chores on them.

I’ve been eating better since Thanksgiving weekend. Having treats here and there. REALLY trying to get myself set for tomorrow. Yep it’s been 17 days since my 35 by 35 post here. Tomorrow starts the working out, and the no cheating part. So far I’ve been prepping myself, coaching myself, and here and there walking, bike riding and trying to get psyched up for this.

My goal was originally 35 by 35. Sadly after I came up with that brilliant idea, I gained a few more pounds. So it went to 38 by 35. NOW I’m back to 35… so if you were trying to do some math by my board… oh and I ran out of room for the last 4 pounds. It should go to 107 (which is what my drivers license says!) Shit, if I get down to 111 I’ll make a chart JUST for the the last 4 pounds!

A side note. PLEASE don’t freak about the numbers. Note I am ONLY 5 feet tall. My average weight for my height is 105-110 lbs.! I can’t stand it when people freak out about the numbers. I’m LITTLE and SHOULD be a little number.

SO… that being said. Here’s to me. Here’s to getting healthy. Here’s to a start of a new me getting back the old me in a new way…? I like that I’m starting a month before everyone else on this too.

Go here to my Pinterest motivation to work out, be healthy and live better!!

Work it Out Pinterest Link!

Happy Friday!

JCat McGack

Thankful

In just this one picture I can count SO many reasons to be thankful.

First the obvious. My two children.
I’m blessed to have been able to have them both, when I wanted. I wanted two spring babies approx. two years apart. I was rewarded with one June baby, Tink. One April baby, Buzz. And they are 22 months apart. THAT I’m incredibly thankful for.

Seeing my children, makes me thankful for Blue. My husband of over 11 years. My best friend, the one person I love to laugh with, dream with, and spend my life with all while enjoying watching our two beautiful children grow into amazing little people.

I see a fire, in a beautiful fireplace.
That resembles home to me. This is my parents, Queen and Carrots, beautiful home.  A place where we are welcomed, fed and loved. I have both of my parents, alive and well. For that I am thankful.

I am thankful to have my sister and parents living so close to us. It’s not the 45 second drive like it used to be. But I’ll take 20 minutes, and enjoy the ride.

I’m thankful for our families and their selflessness to take care of each other. Ed’s family is just as giving, and welcoming. We were both raised by amazing parents. Loved by them. Taught by them. And no matter how dark and cold the world may be. We both know we have family that reminds us of home and comfort.

We are both grateful for what we have. We live with in our means, and remember to be thankful for what we have, not complain about what we don’t have.

Wishing everyone a wonderful and happy thanksgiving. Full of food, friends, family, loved ones, and something to be thankful for.

Gobble till you Wobble!

JCat McGack

Shopping for food and bigger boobs

Today is the 4th day of our “Eating Healthy and working out” life changing event. I’m way less stabby.

I posted a few days ago about how motivated I was… I still am. I have to be honest the first day was one of my lower moments.
I cried. I sat in front of the open fridge drinking Boones Farm Sangria to numb my pain of not being able to eat pasta for every meal. My food heart was broken. I went to my Pinterest board of “Work It Out” and looked for inspiration.

So instead of caving, I went to bed at 9:30pm. The next day was ok… I ate a lot. But all snacks. So eggs for breakfast, then a few hours later an apple, after that lunch was a measured cup of pasta (I NEED carbs) snack was pretzels, dinner was pork chops, corn and apple sauce.

I was wearing thin again that night. It’s our tv munching that gets us. So the next morning I dropped Buzz off at school and Blue and I went to shop for food. Aldi and Walmart later we came home with food we loved to eat. BUT was healthy. A variety of fruit for snacks, pretzel chips, yogurt, fish and chicken for dinners, and now we’ve added Hummus to our snack foods.

Work out routines for me haven’t started yet. No good reason. Soon… maybe today I’ll do the step routine I found in Shape’s recent magazine.

So yesterday my MIL called to celebrate my Christmas with her. It’s been YEARS since I’ve done this with her. It includes a day of clothes shopping and dinner afterwards.

My MIL was hesitant of buying me clothes, if I was going to loose all this weight. HA. I’ve been saying that for 4 years now. I need new clothes. At least feel good about clothes that I know fit me now.  I’ve got to get to that smaller size, before I start worrying about having to big of clothes. New clothes that fit THIS me, inspires me to loose weight, so I can fit into even smaller and cuter clothes!

Starting in Victoria Secrets Pink store. This is my SECOND time EVER in this store. First time was a few weeks ago, my best friend took me. She had to pay a bill… omg. I FEEL IN LOVE. HARD. Bright colors, comfy clothes, cute clothes, things I WEAR everyday!! I spent a good amount of my Christmas present in that store.

Now we ALL know how mean florescent lighting is. Those evil mirrors and all in a tiny room full of static electricity! Gah! It was an awakening to what size I fit in, and what I look like in it… almost like looking at myself through other peoples eyes. Gross.

I’ve had good self esteem most of my life. (thanks to my parents for ALWAYS boosting me up) I’ve got tough skin, but this was brutal.

I’m SUPER inspired to purge the HELL out of my closet. Donate, donate, donate. Again, the new years resolution of 2013, Simplify.

NOW onto the good news. I had my Pink girl, Cassie, measure me. FIRST time ever to be actually measured for a bra (sad I know) I was always a small B. Had kids, kept the big boobs… figured I was a small C now… Cassie said (and I’ve read this before) that 70% of women are in the wrong size bra. Well I walked in wearing a 36 B bra. She measured me. I had her measure me again. And still I doubted her… a 36D!?! WHAT?

ME?

Yes. She showed me on the measuring tape. She wrote it on the little boob card so I can keep it forever. Ah, if I could time travel and show this card to my 12 year old self, and say “You’ll get there someday”

The girl who for 16 years of her life prayed for nothing but boobs. I’m NOT kidding. Church every Sunday? boobs. Mass every morning before classes? Boobs.

I wanted boobs. Everyone else had them, I was tired of being made fun of for not having them. 16! I was 16 when I finally got them! Now don’t get me wrong, I know they are bigger due to my weight. I’m sure when I loose weight, they will get smaller too. I’ve enjoyed my big boobs, and living in big boob land. But I’d be MORE then happy to be my little self again with little self boobs… well not LITTLE boobs. You get my point.

Cassie might as well have said “You aren’t a large, you are a XS!” it was such a compliment… now if I could be an XS again, AND have boobs… life complete*.

JCat McGack

*Amazing that the world paints a picture for what we should be. Not saying I’m gullible and HAVE to fit a stereotype, if that is what my blog post reads as. I want to be healthy, but still have the curves.

35 by 35

That is my goal.

July 19th, 2013 I will be 35 years old. Age is just a number to me, 30 was just another candle on the cake for me. I said it then, 35 will probably hit me harder then 30 does! And I was right.

30 for me was a starting point. I had JUST had my son 3 month prior to my birthday. My plan in life? Married, a home, two kids. All before 30. Done, done, done and done. I rocked my check list. The new start at 30 was to enjoy our children, and the new life as four of us, instead of two.

All fine and dandy. I had a horrible time with PPD, leading to PTSD. I was good at hiding it. Just like most people with depression. You think you know… you have NO idea, what is going on in their heads. The most painful part for me was the kids. My daughter had said to me once “Will you always be an angry mommy?” I was crushed. I vowed to focus, to blog, to journal. And to give myself time outs when I just couldn’t handle the stress. If it was an over eventful few days, or even just a barking dog. Anything could set me off. I’d be sad, angry and short with everyone I came in contact with. Nothing seemed to calm me down faster then food did.

I have, like most people I know, loved carbs. Love them like I love my own children. I mean what’s more comforting on a shitty day, where NOTHING is going right, then a bowl of mashed potatoes? A big bowl of mush to just comfort your sad self.

Now if you’ve been reading my blogs (I’ve gone through a few) you know this isn’t my first attempt to eat right. Be healthy. Blah, blah blah.

But now… now that I feel that the PPD, the PTSD, is gone. That my husband and I are doing good, no fighting. Not much stress around the house, no drama with friends, I can focus on me.

I’ve got to say I thought about taking an easy way out. A friend of mine is taking special pills to help her loose weight super fast. I’m jealous. She’s beautiful to begin with, inside and out. AND now she’s dropping weight super fast?
I remind myself that has NOT worked for me in the past. I get freakishly jittery, and do not do well with drugs.

I tell myself that THIS time both Blue and I are serious about this. He’s doing this with the guys at work. Their company is hosting a get healthy sort of competition for 6 months. This is perfect, he’s my biggest motivation (He’s done the P90X work out 90 days, twice. And gave up his Coke cold turkey 3 years ago. Not drinking pop since)

NOW my motivation in the past has been doing it for the kids. So I’m healthy for them (good idea) I’ve also had reunions I wanted to look great for, or it’s summer, winter, fall, spring, so many reasons, some good some not so good. But none of them were for that ONE reason.

Me.

I had to get my mental self better before I could work on the physical me. I’m there. I’m not getting any younger. I attempted to jog in The Color Run 5K a month back. It was sad… a sad, sad day for me. I’m not a runner, but that was not my best game. I KNOW I can do better.

Proud that I did it. Proud that I did the Warrior Dash 5 months ago. It’s more then I was doing 6 months ago. But it’s not good enough.

Last night was my last night to pig out. I had gone to the store, made a WHOLE pan of dumplings. I ate the WHOLE damn pan full. WOW.

Needless to say I’m good on that food for a while! Same goes for all the fast food I ate last week. It was a busy week, no excuse but I ate like crap just about every day, all day.

Not sure why, but when I have the thought of working out, and eating healthy, I have to say good bye to all my favorite foods by eating them all. Good bye Taco Bell Volcano Burrito (worst thing on the menu for you) good bye deep dish pizza, culvers, shells and cheese…

No more.

Time for 5 small meals a day. Proportions. Eating for the body I want, not the one I have (found the quote on Pinterest)

Oh, HUGE motivation for me. I’ve GOT to share this. I’m a visual girl. MUST see things to get it, to understand. I made myself a board on Pinterest, “Work It Out” I LOVE to read the quotes, thoughts and see the pictures of in shape people. It’s what works for me.

Picked up the newest copy of Shape magazine. Of coarse it’s perfect because my favorite rock star is on the cover, P!nk. So many great ideas, work outs, and tips are in there.

So… that’s all I’ve got for now. 249 days till July 19th. Fingers crossed, stay tuned. I’ll be posting more ideas, inspirations and pictures to come!

JCat McGack